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By Dr. Joti Samra, CEO & Founder of the Psychological Health & Safety (PH&S) Clinic and MyWorkplaceHealth  Create Gratitude Practice with Intention
Gratitude is one of my favourite topics. Gratitude is a practice that can have a significant impact on our overall psychological mental health or wellness, and it is one of the simplest practices to adopt. Most of us know what gratitude is, but here I am going to discuss why gratitude is so important and how to practice gratitude with intention as a way of increasing our resilience. “When you realize there is nothing lacking, the whole world belongs to you.” – Lao Tzu What is gratitude? Very simply – it’s having, feeling and expressing appreciation for what one has, or for what others do for you. But gratitude is more than just etiquette – it’s about a state of mind. Studies have shown that people who frequently articulate and express gratitude experience positive benefits across a range of areas:
Why is an intentional gratitude practice so important? Life gets busy – and life is stressful. And when we are busy and stressed, we all have a natural tendency to focus on responding to things in our environment – trudging through our day’s To Do’s and tasks, without really stopping to smell the roses, so to speak. An intentional gratitude practice can help us make sure that we take mini pauses throughout the day where we are Appreciating and Feeling – rather than just Doing. How to Practice Gratitude
How I Practice Gratitude Personally, I identify things I have gratitude for first thing in the morning (I’m a snoozer ~ so I have a few minutes in those early morning hours where I can think uninterrupted!). I pick 3 things – big or small – that I have gratitude for. These don’t have to be new and unique every day – you can certainly put things on repeat! Then, through the day, I bring my mind back to those 3 things. Some of the things I find I routinely have gratitude for are having a safe and secure home, living in Canada, and having running water. I encourage you to try out an intentional gratitude practice for just one week. Remember to identify at least 3 things – big or small – that you have gratitude for, and try to bring your mind back to these things through the day. By Dr. Joti Samra, CEO & Founder of the Psychological Health & Safety (PH&S) Clinic and MyWorkplaceHealth  How to Declutter to Reduce Anxiety: Tips for a minimalist lifestyle
There is so much talk when it comes to “minimalism” and decluttering our “stuff”. Often, people are stuck in terms of where to start, or don’t even quite understand what minimalism means to them: it is different for everybody. Here I’ll discuss how to declutter to reduce anxiety in order to create a balance between what you love to have in your life, while also maintaining a clutter-free environment with fewer things you don’t need. Why should we be concerned with minimalism and having a clutter-free environment? For starters, there’s a lot of wisdom in the old adage about a cluttered environment leading to a cluttered mind. Too much (of anything) around us leads to reduced focus, efficiency, and a general state of emotional or even physical ‘chaos’. Why does clutter lead to anxiety and stress?
Most people have too much stuff, more than they want or need. For about 6% of the population, this tendency to over-collect and under-purge turns into a clinical compulsive hoarding condition. Hoarding: How is it different from having excessive stuff? This article isn’t about hoarding in particular but let’s define it so we know what the difference is between hoarding and simply having an excess of ‘stuff’. For those who are compulsively hoarding, a few criteria need to be met. A person collects and keeps a lot of items, even things that appear useless or of little value to most people; these items clutter the living spaces and keep the person from using their rooms as they were intended; and, these items cause distress or problems in day-to-day activities. How to Declutter to Maintain Balance Personally, I have found the rule of “if you haven’t worn or used something for a year, purge” not that helpful or practical. There are many items I have and will, or do, use that don’t necessarily meet those criteria. Several years ago, I watched and was significantly impacted, by Minimalism: A Documentary About the Important Things. Now don’t get me wrong – I’m by no means close to being a minimalist. I have a long, long, long way to go. However, after watching this documentary I have found myself to be substantially more aware and intentional about the items I purchase. As well as which items come into our home (getting better at purging is the area I’m still continuing to see as a work in progress!). One of the things that stood out to me from the documentary was to ask yourself one simple question when bringing something in or out of your home: does it have beauty or function? If neither – then out it goes. This is a question I find I repeatedly ask myself when considering a purchase that I may not need. It’s also a question I ask myself when I find I’m resisting letting go of something. How to Declutter Pick only one room in your home you want to declutter. Then break it into sections: for example, in your bathroom, you could have “sink counter”, “medicine cabinet” and “under sink cupboard” as 3 different areas. Make a commitment to purge one area a week. As you review each item within that area, ask yourself: is it either functional or beautiful? Then, move onto another room. I find I can get overwhelmed if I try to do larger purges, and so starting with a drawer or cupboard at a time can be a great way to start! If you’re still having trouble, try making it fun. Put on your favourite upbeat music as you’re organizing it will likely make time feel as though it’s going by quicker. Once you start to see the positive impact of decluttering and living a more minimalist lifestyle, it will get easier and you will find yourself being more intentional about the things you bring into your home. Now that you have some tips on how to declutter I challenge you to start on your next free day! Start small but it will make a difference. By Dr. Melanie Badali, R.Psych.  5 Keys to Successful Goal Setting
There’s something about the start of a new year that motivates us to change. A fresh start to the year makes it the perfect time to clarify our values or vision and set strategic goals. But we all know it’s easier to set goals than it is to actually accomplish them. So, let’s talk about the keys to successful goal setting by expanding our SMART goals and learn to CRAFT our goals. These tips will increase our chances of success. We talk about resolutions at this time of year. Why? Because we need resolve – we need to be committed if our dreams are to become reality. But even resolutions, which start out as firm decisions to do something (or not do something), start to fade and can end up dying out before we succeed. So how can we set ourselves up to achieve our goals? What’s the secret to success? It turns out we don’t need to uncover a secret – we can just dive into the more than 1,000 research studies done on goal setting to find some effective strategies and troubleshoot where we may be getting tripped up. Smart Goal Setting When most people think about tips for successful goal setting, the acronym and mnemonic device “SMART” comes to mind. While there are different interpretations of SMART goals – the most popular appear to be Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Relevant and Time-bound/Timely. Research shows that goals with these qualities, among others, can increase motivation and improve the chances of success. If SMART goals as you know them are working well for you – that’s great. If you want to crank things up a notch by incorporating SMART goal setting into a broader framework informed by Goal-Setting Theory – keep reading to learn how to CRAFT your goals better. The industrial/organizational (I/O) psychologists Dr. Edwin Locke and Dr. Gary Latham, developed Goal-setting Theory based on more than 400 research studies. Put simply, they theorize that specific, hard goals lead to a higher level of task performance than easy goals or vague, abstract goals when the person is committed to the goal, has the ability to attain it, and is not constrained by the situation or conflicting goals. They identified the following five goal-setting principles that can help improve your chances of success: Clarity, Challenge, Commitment, Feedback and Task Complexity. I love a good mnemonic device so I decided to tweak the wording of this classic research slightly so these key ingredients can be easily remembered with the acronym CRAFT. Successful Goal Setting: CRAFT Your Goals
1 - Clarity A clear, specific, measurable goal with a concrete timeline for completion is more achievable than a vague or abstract goal. For example, a goal such as “deposit $100 in savings account every Friday” is clearer than “save money”. The S (specific), M (measurable), and T (time-bound) qualities of SMART goals fit here. 2 - Reach (Challenge) Choose a level of difficulty in order to motivate you to strive toward the goal. Too easy? You get bored. Too hard? You get frustrated. Set yourself up for success here. Reach enough past your comfort zone that you can feel good about what you have done. Think about the A (attainable) of SMART goals here. Aim for a hard goal within your ability. Something you can reach but have to stretch for is your target. Choosing an R (relevant) goal will also be helpful here – challenging yourself can be uncomfortable so you want it to be worth it! 3 - Adherence (Commitment) Research shows that commitment to the goal is enhanced by self-efficacy (task-specific confidence) and viewing the goal as important and meaningful. The R (relevant) of SMART goals comes in here. If the goal is not relevant – it will be harder to commit to and stick with when the going gets tough (why bother?). Put your values into action and commit to your goal – be willing to adhere or stick to it even when things get tough. 4 - Feedback People need feedback in order to track their progress and course-correct, if necessary. Set up a method to receive information on your progress toward a goal. If the goal turns out to be too hard, you have time to adjust your goal or plan of action midway through the timeline rather than give up entirely. The M (measurable) and T (time-bound) from SMART goals come in here as well. Choose something that can be measured over time helps you get feedback and stay on track. Feedback can also be rewarding and motivating. 5 - Task Complexity Task knowledge is harder to acquire on complex or complicated tasks so set goals in line with the task’s complexity. Give yourself enough time to account for the learning curve and/or consider chunking tasks into smaller steps. The A (attainable) of SMART goals is relevant here. Consider whether you have the requisite ability to achieve the goal. If you do not, you may need to either adjust your goal, come up with a plan to develop your skills, or delegate parts of the task. Situational Constraints: Trouble Shooting Tip CRAFT+S Goal setting and achievement do not occur in a vacuum. Situational factors are relevant. It’s not just about you. You need to ask yourself whether you have the necessary resources to accomplish the task. Researchers Brown, Jones, and Leigh (2005) found that goals affected performance only when role overload (excess work without the necessary resources to accomplish a task) was low. You can be a superstar with self-efficacy and ability but if there are situational constraints (e.g., insufficient resources) – you may find yourself coming up short on your goals. Consider whether there are ways to overcome situational barriers to your success and incorporate them into your plan. Feeling motivated to change? You can do it! Set yourself up for success – start goal setting using CRAFT goals. Need More Support? Successful goal setting can be challenging, particularly on the heels of an extremely challenging year. If you’re having trouble getting started, or want extra support with goal setting this year, reach out to the Psychological Health & Safety Clinic to get up a consultation with a counsellor. By Dr. Joti Samra, CEO & Founder of the Psychological Health & Safety (PH&S) Clinic and MyWorkplaceHealth  Valentine’s Day isn’t Designed for Queer Couples
Valentine’s Day is a consumer ‘holiday’ that we’re bombarded with starting in the middle of January – whether you like it or not. Not only are red, white and pink treats and branded presents at almost every store, but we are shown images of happy couples in advertisements everywhere. Not only is this challenging for those who are single around Valentines Day, but it can also be challenging for those who identify somewhere on the LGBTQ+ spectrum. Valentine’s Day isn’t designed for queer couples. Why isn’t Valentine’s Day Queer? For many folks who identify as queer, Valentine’s Day is a reminder that their identity isn’t represented which can make them feel invisible or unimportant. It does this by reinforcing the idea that ‘ideal’ and happy relationships are heterosexual, monogamous, sexual and romantic. And really anyone who doesn’t fit into that ideal feels as though they’re failing somehow. Think about the things we are surrounded by this time of year. Jewelry commercials are almost always depicting cisgender heterosexual couples and upholding the traditional gender norm of ‘the man’ giving a beautiful and expensive gift to his female partner. We see the same ideas reflected in the products; such as “His & Hers” monogrammed items and cards specifically address to husband/wife or boyfriend/girlfriend. And if/when we attempt to participate in Valentine’s Day we are likely to be met by heternormative assumptions. For example, “oh your boyfriend will love this” when purchasing a gift. Or having a server at a restaurant assuming your gender or relationship status. Yes, queer representation and queer-focused products do exist, and this continues to improve – but the ones that are available are not easily accessible. And the images we are bombarded with are of straightness. Though being queer does not mean we have to reject Valentine’s Day as a whole. We all deserve to be able to celebrate our love no matter what it looks like. Many in the queer community are already good at subverting the norms, reclaiming and celebrating all types of love. So, how can you celebrate Valentine’s Day as a queer person? 1. Have a movie night in with your loved one(s) or your close friends. Valentine’s Day does not have to be about romantic love, so spend the day with people that you care about and find some great queer-focused films to watch together. Consider this list as a great starting point. 2. Buy (or make) a queer-friendly Valentine’s Day card. It’s less likely that you’re going to walk into a Hallmark store and find a card that represents your identity so start thinking about it early. Give yourself to find some cool cards online (Etsy is a great place to start) or consider making your own. 3. Support queer businesses. 4. Go out with a group of queer couples (or as singles) to increase your visibility. 5. Consider making a Valentine’s donation to an LGBTQ+ organization rather than buying presents. If you’re in Vancouver consider one of the following options:
Remember that Valentine’s Day is just another day and regardless of how you feel about it, your relationship status, or your sexual orientation or gender identity you are valid and you will get through the day. Try to surround yourself with positive representations of queerness and queer love and remind yourself that love doesn’t have to look the way it’s advertised to you. Keep doing you! For those who don’t identify as LGBTQ+ but also don’t love the way relationships are represented during Valentine’s Day or simply want to support your queer friends during this time of year what can you do? How to be a queer ally during Valentine's Day 1. Don’t assume someone has plans for Valentine’s Day. Meaning, don’t ask what their plans are unless you explicitly know they plan to celebrate it. This not only helps to support queer folks who don’t want to celebrate Valentine’s Day but also those who are single and don’t want to be reminded they don’t have plans (or at least not traditional plans). 2. Don’t assume the gender of someone’s partner. (Really you should never assume someone’s gender.) 3. Don’t make assumptions about or judge how someone chooses to celebrate Valentine’s Day. Remember – Valentine’s Day is ultimately about celebrating love – which at its heart involves connection and unconditional acceptance. Consider ways you can connect and unconditionally accept yourself and others around you this Valentine’s Day. By Dr. Joti Samra, CEO & Founder of the Psychological Health & Safety (PH&S) Clinic and MyWorkplaceHealth  Goals…we all set them – lose that last five pounds, eat better, quit smoking – but only a few of us actually find it easy to make those changes in our lives, particularly if we are changing long-standing patterns. One of the reasons that goals, like New Years Resolutions, often fail is that we aren’t setting effective and achievable goals. There is a major difference between wishing something would change and setting a goal to make that change and following through.
Fitness and diet goals are among the most commonly set goals (as well as the ones that so regularly fail). Many of us start the week strong, but by mid-week, we have lost sight of eating healthy or exercising and fall back into old habits. You don’t need a Ph.D. in health sciences to know that diet, exercise, and sleep are three of the most crucial things that can dramatically impact and – when properly addressed – improve both physical and psychological health. But the diet, fitness, and pharmaceutical industries are lucrative, multibillion-dollar industries for a reason: Most people struggle with sustaining long-term change in these areas. So, welcome to the club! What can you do to enhance the likelihood of sustainable change? Here are six steps to planning and executing your goal to increase the likelihood of success. 1. Pick a specific behaviour to change.Start with no more than one to two behaviours to change at a time.
2. Identify readiness to change. Before beginning, ask questions such as: “How ready am I?” “Is this the right time for me to make a change?” “What are the pros and cons of changing?”
3. Identify barriers. Anticipate setbacks. If we tried to make a change in the past, what got in the way of success?
4. Implement change. Approach behavioural change gradually. Make small, specific changes.
5. Revisit and revise. Do not get discouraged by setbacks. If we are not on track with the changes identified, work to identify the barriers again. Were our expectations too high? Was the specific goal we set too ambitious?
6. Remember Rewards. Set milestones that help track progress and ensure to schedule in regular rewards for each achievement. Behaviour change can be challenging – especially if we have been developing the habit over a number of years. Remember these six steps and know you that success doesn’t happen overnight. Be consistent and know that we all face setbacks, it’s how we keep getting back on track that will eventually lead to permanent change. Editor’s Note: This post was originally published as part of a Globe and Mail “Ask the Psychologist” column authored by Dr. Samra, and has been edited and updated. By Dr. Joti Samra, CEO & Founder of the Psychological Health & Safety (PH&S) Clinic and MyWorkplaceHealth The question:
Lately I’ve been feeling uninterested in socializing. All I want to do is stay home and have netflix marathons. I’ve been feeling like this for about two months. Should I be worried I’m no longer wanting to spend time with friends and family – which I used to enjoy? The answer: All of us can benefit from the occasional TV binge. It can give us time to unwind from the day-to-day grind of our lives and give us an opportunity to recharge. However, if your tendency to avoid people has been going on for weeks or months on end, there may be cause for concern. Periods of feeling down or sad are common for all of us; most of the time when we feel this way, we aren’t depressed. Usually, mood changes will go away on their own within a few days or weeks, especially as stressors that commonly cause these mood changes start to resolve. For some people, mood issues may continue for weeks or longer. If you find that you have been feeling sad or down and have had little interest in things you normally enjoy, like spending time with friends, for an extended period, it’s possible you are struggling with an emotional problem like depression. Depression is one of the most common psychological health conditions and affects one out of four people over the course of their lifetime. Contrary to popular belief, depression doesn’t always mean feeling sad or tearful – for some people, a “depressed” mood may feel like irritability or frustration, and for others it may be associated with feeling “flat” or feeling “nothing.” Depression comes along with other problems that may include:
If you are feeling any of the above – particularly if you are having dark thoughts – you should speak to your family doctor or a psychologist or psychiatrist. There are very effective treatments for depression, including cognitive-behavioural therapy, interpersonal therapy and, for some people, medication therapy. With time and the right treatment, you can get better. You may be able to access free services through your local mental health agency (see www.cmha.ca for a Canadian Mental Health Association office near you). By Dr. Joti Samra, CEO & Founder of the Psychological Health & Safety (PH&S) Clinic and MyWorkplaceHealth  We know sleep is a critical contributor to our overall state of physical and psychological health. One of the most important functions of sleep involves allowing our bodies and our brains to recover and recharge. Sleep is even more important for children, as it directly impacts mental and physical development The topic of children and sleep can be a challenging one though. Children don’t typically understand the importance of sleep and aren’t intrinsically wired to maintain a sleep schedule and structure without external guidance. So, as a child develops, it’s up to their caregivers to manage their sleep schedule and ensure they’re getting enough sleep. Managing children’s sleep problems can be hard enough but teenagers may be even more challenging. We will also address teenagers’ sleep challenges here.
Children and sleep Sleep patterns and needs change drastically across age ranges. For instance, those who have experienced a newborn know that sleep happens whenever the child feels like it, making the parents’ sleep schedule highly irregular. Fortunately, between the age of 6 months to 2 years, children typically begin to develop more of a regular sleep pattern. Once this happens, it’s possible to start implementing proper sleep hygiene principles. Sleep Hygiene for Children Here are 5 effective sleep tips for children aged 2-13 years that can help children with sleep problems:
Sleep hygiene is always the best place to start when it comes to managing sleep challenges but what if it isn’t enough? What if sleep hygiene doesn't work? Sleep hygiene should always be tried first when it comes to sleep challenges. For children and adults alike, maintaining consistently good sleep hygiene is typically enough to help with sleep problems. It’s important to note that sleep hygiene will likely take a few weeks, or longer, to have a noticeable impact on your child’s sleep. So be patient and consistent with their bedtime routine. If your child still has sleep problems (such as not being able to fall asleep, or waking up in the night) some other home treatment options have been found to be effective. For example, research has found white noise played over the course of the night was able to help children with ADHD get to sleep faster and stay asleep longer. Weighted blankets are also demonstrating some preliminary and promising effects on sleep for children with Autism Spectrum Disorder. Teenagers and Sleep Another age category that tends to have significant sleep challenges is teenagers. Despite the traditional angsty know-it-all attitude and resistance some teens may have to regular sleep, their brains are still developing as well as their bodies changing, so sleep is just as important during these years as it was when they were younger. What impacts teenagers’ sleep? Many of us can remember being a teenager and wanting to stay up excessively late, resisting structure and schedule in terms of sleep. And, as a result, feeling constantly sleep-deprived or irritated and grumpy as a result. This is not just rebellious teenager behaviour. Research has shown in the teen years circadian rhythms change drastically, as do hormones. Teenagers don’t just want to stay up longer, their body is telling them to. All the while their schooling starts just as early, if not earlier than it did when they were younger. The net result is sleep-deprivation, as environmental expectations make getting the required amount of sleep more difficult. So, how can we support our teenagers in getting better sleep?We may think that allowing them to sleep in on the weekends to catch up on sleep is the best thing we can do. It isn’t. Letting them sleep in actually makes things worse, as this disrupts the body’s internal clock even more. Remember – a consistent bedtime and wake up time is an important aspect of sleep hygiene – and as such, keeping a consistent schedule is still the best thing for teenagers. Since their circadian rhythms are changing and impacting the time they want to sleep, it can be helpful to adjust this sleep rhythm. This can be done by adjusting their light exposure, such that light is increased in the mornings and decreased at nighttime. Effectively adjusting light exposure involves (1) exposing oneself to natural light (even it it’s cloudy) shortly upon waking up in the morning, and (2) removing light in the evenings by ensuring lights are dimmed. There are blackout blinds/curtains, and discouraging use of screens like smartphones, TV’s and computers before bed. Final Thoughts If your child or teenager still has significant sleep problems or other contributing health issues (physically or emotionally), it’s recommended you speak to a medical professional. Sleep is a very important and incredibly complex process, so when presented with recurrent issues it should be addressed by a qualified healthcare professional and not self-diagnosed or self-medicated. By Dr. Joti Samra, CEO & Founder of the Psychological Health & Safety (PH&S) Clinic and MyWorkplaceHealth The question:
I hate giving and receiving gifts. It seems so materialistic to me – but everyone around me seems to just love it at this time of year. Is there something wrong with me? How can I mentally get behind the idea of gift giving? The answer: Christmas has become an increasingly commercialized holiday: you are not alone in your feelings about gifts. I would challenge your perception that everyone around you seems to love it at this time of year – although many people outwardly may seem to love the holiday season and all the associated traditions. I think if you were to ask people, you’d be surprised at how many share your sentiments. The Christmas holiday itself is religious – but more broadly is viewed by even those with non-religious views as being a time of celebration, love, and giving. The gift component can take away from the true spirit and intent of Christmas, particularly when an emphasis is placed on what one “wants” and is “getting”. The reality is that the holiday season can also become a hugely taxing time of year from a financial perspective. Unfortunately, the focus on gift giving adds to the social pressure that many feel to “keep up with the Joneses”. The net effect is that individuals often get in real financial debt, which is one of the biggest reasons why the Christmas holidays (and the January aftermath) become the most stressful time of year for many. Instead of trying to accept something that is inconsistent with your beliefs, speak openly with your loved ones and others that you exchange gifts with about how you feel. I think you may be surprised at the reaction that you get. Do not be shy about expressing your underlying reasons, which stem from the values you hold. Indicate that you feel that the holiday season and gift-giving is becoming overly materialistic, and that you would like to think of adding some new traditions this year. Propose setting a monetary limit or gifts, or only giving hand-made gifts. Suggest keeping the gift giving for children only. Think about having a Secret Santa gift exchange (where everyone brings one gift, and each person receives only one). Or, propose adopting a family in need and providing gifts to that family. Excerpted from Dr. Joti Samra’s “Ask the Psychologist” weekly column in The Globe and Mail. By Dr. Joti Samra, CEO & Founder of the Psychological Health & Safety (PH&S) Clinic and MyWorkplaceHealth The question:
When is retail therapy unhealthy? The answer: “Retail therapy” is a tongue-in-cheek term we tend to use (especially us women) to refer to shopping behaviour that has the primary aim of improving our emotional state. Getting something new that we like can naturally make us feel good – particularly when it is something that may contribute to enhancing our self-esteem or confidence, such as clothes, shoes or makeup. The natural little high that comes along with this is very normal and for the majority of people will not become problematic. But some people may find that they have an urge to shop when they are sad, depressed, anxious or even angry. Although this can lead to a temporary lift in mood, often our decision-making is poor when we are experiencing negative emotions and we may make choices we later regret. There are three key questions to ask yourself to determine whether your shopping behaviour is unhealthy: 1. Do you get the urge to shop particularly when you are experiencing negative emotions? 2. Do you find it difficult to resist the urge to shop during these times? 3. Is your behaviour resulting in negative results effects (e.g., are you getting yourself into financial debt; do you feel guilty afterward; is it creating conflict with your partner)? If you answer yes to one or more of these questions, you are likely engaging in shopping behaviour that is unhealthy. There are a few things that you can do to work on this. First, articulate the negative effects of your behaviour. Write them down and be specific. Put this list somewhere visible. Second, identify which particular moods tend to increase the likelihood that you will engage in “retail therapy.” Work to regulate these negative emotions. Seek treatment for underlying mood issues if these have been unaddressed. Try instead different activities that will intrinsically improve your mood, such as visiting with a friend or going for a walk. Third, Third, consider what environmental triggers urge you to shop (e.g., a fight with your partner, a bad day at work). Work on a solution to these situations because targeting the underlying cause will be more effective than focusing strictly on the shopping behaviour. Fourth, put a price to your behaviour. What is this costing you on a monthly basis? And how is that interfering with other short- and long-term financial goals you have? Finally, make a commitment to change your behaviour. Be specific about what you are going to do. And start immediately. Excerpted from Dr. Joti Samra’s “Ask the Psychologist” weekly column in The Globe and Mail. By Dr. Joti Samra, CEO & Founder of the Psychological Health & Safety (PH&S) Clinic and MyWorkplaceHealth  We’ve all heard the advice of striving for work-life balance. This suggests, for most of us, that work is tipping the scales and we need to spend more time on other aspects of our non-work personal lives – and in some cases to ‘get a life’. The reality of modern-day work structure – right or wrong – is that we now work longer hours than ever. The modern-day work environment and global economy, combined with technology which now allows us to work 24/7, along with the cost of living makes it increasingly more difficult to achieve balance: if we look at this as an actual scale, for most of us, work is going to significantly tip the scales based simply on the number of hours we spend working.
Work-life balance also suggests that portions of our lives should be separated into different sections but it isn’t always that simple. Many of us choose our profession based on something we are passionate about or we feel gives us meaning. Therefore, it isn’t always easy to separate work and life. So, rather than striving for work-life balance, we should be thinking about achieving work-life harmony. This means arranging the different aspects of our lives so that they work together in harmony – like an orchestra. What can we do to achieve work-life harmony? 1. Make conscious choices Conductors create great harmonies by getting different instruments in the orchestra to work together effectively and by emphasizing different instruments at different times. For us, this means ensuring we make conscious choices about the activities we engage in, including work, and what is important to us. This also means attempting to have a plan in regards to the time we spend. Whenever possible make conscious decisions about how much we are going to work and how we are going to spend the rest of our time. 2. Work with passion When possible work in a field that we can be passionate about, or find aspects of our current position that we love. Research suggests that we are happier and more invested in our work when we can find meaning in that work. 3. Prioritize working with people we like Since we are spending a significant portion of time with our co-workers, our relationship with them can affect how we feel throughout the day. We are likely to be happier if we enjoy the people we are working with. This could mean choosing to spend more time with the people we like and get along with at work or building better relationships with the people we work with. Alternatively, if we are working with people we don’t get along with we should attempt to manage those relationships or conflicts better, or even consider switching work environments, if possible. 4. Stay active and get rest Exercise and sleep have a positive impact on our brain function and our productivity at work. While our busy lives don’t always make it easy for us to get the optimal amount of activity or rest (in addition to everything else), something is better than nothing. Consider starting small and finding ways to incorporate movement into the workday (such as walking or biking to work, using a stand-up desk or exercise ball instead of a standard chair, or incorporating a walking meeting into your schedule). Sleep is especially important when it comes to our focus, productivity, and creativity at work. Establishing a sleep routine – where we go to bed at the same time every night and wake up at the same time every morning – can help us achieve a more restful sleep. If a routine isn’t possible, there are a number of ways to increase our sleep hygiene that may be easier to incorporate into your schedule. 5. Don’t let obstacles or limitations overwhelm Obstacles and setbacks are a part of everyone’s lives but how we deal with them has a significant effect on our attitude as well as whether or not we are able to overcome them. Remaining optimistic and positive in the face of limitations and obstacles helps us become more resilient. While remaining positive or optimistic in all situations can be difficult, sometimes it’s about finding one small, good thing in the tough moments that are out of our control. For example, many of us commute to work. There are times that we are in a rush and we get stuck in traffic. Rather than allowing this to anger us and start our day off negatively, we can refocus our energy on music, or an audiobook or podcast to bring harmony back into that moment. Shifting our focus from balance to harmony We’ve been conditioned to think that true happiness lies in achieving a balance between our work and our personal lives. But with technology and the shift of work from something that pays our bills to a passion project, balance no longer means what it did 10 years ago. Instead, work-life harmony allows us to think about our lives differently. It becomes less about tipping an imaginary scale and more about the imaginary orchestra you can create. |
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