PH&S Clinic

  • Home
  • Counselling
  • Coaching
  • About
  • Contact
  • Resources
    • Podcast
    • Articles
  • Home
  • Counselling
  • Coaching
  • About
  • Contact
  • Resources
    • Podcast
    • Articles

Is my boyfriend's psychologist sabotaging our relationship?

24/11/2022

 
By Dr. Joti Samra, CEO & Founder of the Psychological Health & Safety (PH&S) Clinic and MyWorkplaceHealth 
The question:

My boyfriend is in therapy, which I encouraged him to do. But sometimes I worry about the psychologist saying disparaging things about our relationship. Would a professional do this or am I being paranoid?

The answer:

One of the most important roles for a competent psychologist is to be objective, neutral, and balanced in terms of their perspectives on their patient’s life situations.

That said, psychologists – like any other individual in any profession – range in terms of their skills, efficacy and approach. So the answer is that a competent and ethical psychologist should not be making inappropriate judgmental comments to your boyfriend. But, like any other profession, there is always the small chance that a professional may be acting in a non-professional manner.

One’s relationship is often a very appropriate area for discussion in a therapeutic relationship, so chances are good that your relationship has been discussed in some capacity.

The more important question is what other worries you may be having about your relationship. To me, it sounds like you are concerned that your boyfriend may be bringing up these issues in therapy and that the psychologist may be commenting on them.

My best advice would be to have a straightforward and open conversation with your boyfriend. Remain respectful of the fact that your boyfriend may – very appropriately and understandably – not want to talk about any details of his therapy with you. Instead, the goal of putting your concern on the table is to initiate a discussion about any areas of your relationship that you or your boyfriend think could be improved upon.

Ask him openly how he thinks things are going in your relationship, and if there are areas that he thinks need to be improved upon. Share your perspective and identify what you see as strengths and weaknesses.

Take a positive, problem-solving approach where you work toward thinking about ways that you could both improve any areas that are less than ideal from one or both of your perspectives. Try to not get defensive when you have this conversation.

Remember that all relationships have challenges, and that the stronger couples speak openly about areas of weakness and proactively work on them.

​
Excerpted from Dr. Joti Samra’s “Ask the Psychologist” weekly column in The Globe and Mail.

Comments are closed.

    PH&S Clinic

    Enhancing psychological health, wellness and resilience

    Archives

    April 2025
    March 2025
    February 2025
    January 2025
    December 2024
    November 2024
    October 2024
    September 2024
    August 2024
    July 2024
    June 2024
    May 2024
    April 2024
    March 2024
    February 2024
    January 2024
    December 2023
    November 2023
    October 2023
    September 2023
    August 2023
    July 2023
    June 2023
    May 2023
    April 2023
    March 2023
    February 2023
    January 2023
    December 2022
    November 2022
    October 2022
    August 2022

    Mental Health

    All
    Anxiety
    Ask The Psychologist
    Burnout
    Career
    CBT
    Communication
    Coping
    Counselling
    Emotions
    Exercises
    Family & Relationships
    Holidays
    LGBTQ+
    Lifestyle
    Men's Issues
    Mindfulness
    OCD
    Resources
    Sleep
    Suicide
    Supporting Others
    Women's Issues
    Workplace

    RSS Feed

Picture
HOME  |  COUNSELLING  |  COACHING  |  ABOUT  |  CONTACT  | RESOURCES
​© 2025 PH&S CLINIC, VANCOUVER, BC, CANADA
Dr. Joti Samra is a Founding Member of the CSA Technical Committee that developed the CSA National Standard for Psychological Health & Safety in the Workplace and informed the ISO standard
Please note our administrative office hours are Mondays - Thursdays, 8:30am-4:00pm PST.